Q: When is a typhoon not a typhoon? A: When it's a typhoon

It's time for the feature you've dreamed about.  Etymology Corner!  No, not the one about insects: the other one.  Are you excited?  The merchandise isn't printed yet, but I'm sure it's only a matter of time.  Anyway, this as much for my benefit as yours, so pipe down.

Question: where does the word 'typhoon' come from?

If you said Chinese (hopefully not aloud, you crazy old sausage) - you're right!  Sort of. Then again, if you said Urdu, Persian, Arabic or Greek, you're also right.  And wrong.  All at once.

According to the OED, typhoon is effectively two separate words with two separate roots to describe similar weather phenomena in two different places.  A typhoon is "a violent storm or tempest occurring in India" (from Urdu).  A typhoon, on the other hand, is "a violent cyclonic storm or hurricane occurring in the China seas and adjacent regions" (from Cantonese).  The pronunciation of the word has probably been steered by Greek.

In other words, one man's typhoon is another man's typhoon.  You say typhoon, I say typhoon.  Let's call the whole thing off.